Several years ago when I separated from my husband, I bought three CDs. Unlike the Veggie Tales and Anne Kaffeekanne discs with which I usually stocked my car, these were for me. It shouldn’t have been a big deal; I just wanted to surround myself with something that made me happy.

I listened to those CDs a lot in the car, both when I was alone and when my kids were with me. I didn’t think much about it until one day one of them asked, “Mom, why didn’t you like music until after Dad left?”

That question stopped me short. I had always liked music. Why did they think I hadn’t? I realized then that everything I had played in the car up until that time had either been their choice or their dad’s choice. I had just gone along with it.

I learned an important lesson that day about non-verbal communication. As much as I focus on it at work and in others, it doesn’t stop at five o’clock or in the presence of my family. I am–we all are–on all the time. Words do matter, but actions speak volumes.

Now that I’ve been reminded, what do I need to change?